My late father was a UCC (United Church of Christ) minister, but he was also quite a chauvinist. The title of this piece was just one example of his sayings. Fortunately, he restricted his chauvinism to the privacy of our home, although why my mother didn't kill him years ago remains a mystery to me and my siblings.
My mother was an elementary school teacher and, while she didn't take crap from anyone else, she seemed to have a fair degree of tolerance for him. Sometimes, though, he came close to stepping over the line. Her pet name for him was "Jackass" and he seemed to always know that, when he was addressed by that endearing moniker, that it was time to back off or die.
My younger sister, the other female in the house, also occasionally was the target of his not-always appreciated sense of humor. Her nickname, based upon her chest, was "Flatso". Despite such endearments, they were actually quite close. (Her nickname for him was "Geezer".)
In public, my father conducted himself the way you would expect a minister to act: respectful, supportive, and humorous without being extreme. He was a volunteer fireman, drove the ambulance, and mentored younger clergymen. If only they knew what he was really like.
In life, we learn by seeing both how things are done and how they are not done. My father provided both examples, though most were how things should be done. Among the things I learned from him were:
- honesty
- importance of family and friends
- being respectful toward others
- money isn't everything
- if you're going to be a jerk, do it in private
- some women have to unbutton their blouses to count to two
(Damn; sorry about that. Not everything I learned was helpful.)
For me, being a nurse and working in a profession that is 95% female, I would never follow in his footsteps to chauvinism. If I had, I would probably be dead (or severely disabled). Despite the challenges of growing up with my father, and the challenges I gave him growing up, I guess I turned out OK.
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