Saturday, September 7, 2019

Donnie Douchebag




Sometimes, my mind wanders to strange subjects. Today, I was thinking of nicknames. Many people throughout history have had famous nicknames:
- Al "Scarface" Capone
- Richard the Lionhearted
- George "Babe" Ruth
- George "Blood and Guts" Patton
You can probably think of dozens more, belonging to famous people or friends and acquaintances of your. Nicknames are often given because of physical attributes (during WW II, author William Manchester was known as "Tripod" by his fellow Marines; you can probably guess why). Others may earn their nicknames because of their personalities.
Our current president is fond of giving unflattering nicknames to people who piss him off:
-Joe "Sleepy Joe" Biden
- Jeb "Low Energy" Bush
- Elizabeth "Pocahontas" Warren
- Ted "Lyin' Ted" Cruz
and the list goes on and on.
In my musings, I was wondering about a nickname for our President. This week, "Mr. Sharpie" would be fitting, but it would become obsolete as memories fade or move on to whatever stupid thing he says or does the next week.
If you wanted to give him a nickname related to his appearance, something about being orange would be fitting but, in my mind, not good enough.
This leaves his personality, which creates almost endless possibilities. I am somewhat at a loss to list his positive qualities, although I am sure many people can identify something about him that they view as positive. For those who can, you may be a better person than I am, and that's OK.
From my observations, this is what I see:
- lying is like breathing (12,000+ lies since taking office and counting)
- being ethical is a waste of time; it doesn't make money
- he is never wrong (according to him)
- cheating on your spouse (all of them) is normal behavior
- he thinks he is the best at everything (finance, trade, international relations, estimating crowd sizes,
 meteorology, etc.) (I would point out that being modest is not a strength of his.)
The President likes to brag that he has been on the cover of Time magazine more than anyone else. Even among Presidents, he's not even close. Here are some comparisons:
Nixon: 43
Reagan: 39
Clinton: 35
Obama: 23
Trump: 14 (this includes both before and during office)
I came across the above picture of a Time Magazine cover. I am sure it's a fake (Trump was famous for displaying  fakes of Time Magazine covers featuring him at his various properties). Even though I am sure the cover is satire, I think it provides the perfect nickname; one which will stand the test of time.
This week, he may be "Mr. Sharpie", but, to paraphrase Winston Churchill, if the United States would last for a thousand years, he will always be "Donnie Douchebag".




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